Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Come and go.

That's what everyone / most people say ; That friends come and go. Am I right? And then they say the true ones are the ones that stay. Its funny how you think you have honestly found a true friend, but then one thing you know, their completely gone. Not literally, but it definitely feels like it. Honestly my mind is so bipolar about the lost of a great friendship. It’s been a yes it bugs me, to a "No I don't care anymore, I'll still live". And yet, it's still like that. I care, and I don't care. It bugs me, then it doesn't. Its hard to get over something that was there for so long, and that was pretty strong, and watch it fade pretty quickly. We let everything get in the way. We assumed we were too busy for each other, and now we stand so distant from each other. It’s new to me saying "we're not bestfriends anymore" but regardless, I'm always going to be here, and care for her. You know, I wish we actually put all our effort in saving the friendship. But I guess we got caught up in other things, and assumed that we didn't want each other to be there anymore.

I don't understand why you thought I was pushing you away. Well I do, but you should have known that it's so simple to just point it out to me, and in a second I'd try my best to fix it. Sure people say to fix it now, but some things are just too late. We've tried several times, but instead we grew apart instead. After our last talk, seems like we say hi to each other more than before. Like we said, we can still be friends, and maybe everything will build again. Haa oh wells right? Besides, "Friends come and Go." It's true, you came into my life, and now you're not really there. But at the same time, I've made other strong friendships, and after losing you as a bestfriend, now I have a greater fear of losing the people I currently have and also the people I have just gotten to build friendships with. I don't want people think that my friendship with you means nothing and that I can just let it go like that. I've been holding on to it for so long, that I'm really done with struggling about it.

But like I said, even though things aren't the same, I'm still always going to be here . But you know, even though that’s pretty much gone, I'm strong, and it will past. Other than that, couple or few people helps me out with things, and I appreciate that so much. They're amazing .  

God, is the main reason why I’m still smiling and why I’m thankful.